This is a known issue. Been around for years. Unfortunately, Microsoft has no sure fire method to resolve it.
I am currently having this issue and would really like to find a supported solution, as I will not be shelling out the big bucks for 2013 Ultimate with this issue stopping me from using it for web load testing.
Issues with this have been under discussion on msdn since at least 2007: http://blogs.msdn.com/b/mtaute/archive/2007/11/09/diagnosing-and-fixing-web-test-recorder-bar-issues.aspx
3rd party edit
The link above contains different "fixes" depending on the OS and the VS version. The version 2013 was not mentioned. But to include at least some information the following quotes are extracts from Michael Taute (MSFT) post:
VSTS 2005: Vista:
Recorder bar displays, but the controls are disabled.
Fix: Webtest recording using VS 2005 on Vista only works when running in
elevated mode. [When launching VS 2005, right click the icon and choose to
run as administrator]
or
VSTS 2005, 2008: Windows 2003/Vista:
Recorder bar comes up, but the controls are disabled.
Fix: the web test recorder bar does not work with IE enhanced security
enabled. (VSTS 2008 will actually display an error message telling you
this) IE enhanced security can be removed from within the Control
panel / Add Remove Programs / Windows Setup
or
VSTS 2005, 2008, 2010 Beta 1: Windows 7:
When launching the recorder, the recorder bar does not appear
Fix: The Windows 7 security model is slightly different than previous
versions of windows. (go figure :)
To get the recorder to show up, you’ll have to run Visual Studio
in elevated mode.