All right, something REALLY frustrating and weird is going on. I have JQuery installed on my server, and I know it's imported correctly because when I run a simple...
$(function() { alert('hello') });
It alerts "hello." However, when I try to use a css selector...
$(".image").css("border","3px solid red");
It does not work! Yes, I'm 100% sure there is something with that class name in the file. Here's the real kicker, when I COPY PASTED my code into a jsFiddle it worked just fine. What gives?!