Perfection is something everyone strives for but no one really reaches. With the right mindset, however, you'll realize that this is a good thing. Being a teenager is difficult, as many people expect you to be perfect in many different things -- school, sports, chores, etc. Striving for total perfection is a good way to push yourself to become the best adult you can be. However, you should remember that, in the end, true perfection is impossible. What really matters is trying to be better, and having the confidence to pursue your dreams.

Method 1
Method 1 of 3:

Finding Perfection in Everyday Life

  1. This includes goals, living arrangements, etc. Actual perfection, when nothing ever goes wrong and everything is amazing, is not possible. But you can get close by paying attention to your hopes and desires, striving to better yourself, and enjoying the present moment. When you envision your perfect day, what do you see? Who is there, what are you doing, and where are you?
    • Focus on things in your control, like your studies, career goals, and lifestyle.
    • Think of people whose lives you admire. What about their life appeals to you?
    • There is no "right" way to live a perfect life, so don't try and imitate anyone else. Instead, follow your own passions, dreams, and desires.[1]
  2. Volunteering, tutoring a friend, and helping your parents around the house aren't just nice things to do, they can improve your own well-being.[2] Doing good makes you feel good and it builds a loving, supportive network of people around you that will help if your own life ever gets tough. Make your life about more than just you and the feeling of perfection will creep one step closer.
  3. Education is, and always will be, the easiest way to make something of your life. Through education, you improve your job prospects, your ability to think and reason in any situation, and your general knowledge on a variety of subjects. School, however, often makes it difficult to truly enjoy learning, turning it instead into a stressful chore you must slog through. However, by re-framing school as a chance for a free education, enjoying the learning purely for leaning's sake, you can find new motivation to study and grow with or without a teacher.
    • The old adage, "knowledge is power," could not be truer. It doesn't matter what you do in life, the ability to learn and hold knowledge will help you be successful and happy.
    • The way to accept challenges in life is to see them as learning opportunities and potential moments for growing.
    • It depends on your underlying belief system and your way of looking at things.
    • Some people try to overcome challenges. After they overcome them, they feel they have accomplished something.
  4. You are busy, and it often feels like people need teenagers to do 8,000 things every 24 hours. But you need to put your own happiness first sometimes in order to do your very best work. Each day, take 15 minutes or more to yourself. You could read, listen to music, go for a walk, or simply lay in bed and count the stars on your ceiling. Distance yourself from other people, if only for a few moments, and relax. As you do, let your brain stray from all the stresses that hit you each day. Just enjoy the moment and think about yourself.[3]
    • This is one of the easiest, best ways to tune into yourself and your goals.
    • Try meditation for 15 minutes a day. It's been proven to aid mental, social, and physical health.[4]
  5. Being a teenager is not easy. You are expected to excel in school, prepare for your future, join a few clubs, help with chores, and still "be a kid" and have some fun, all while undergoing profound mental and physical changes. But being a teenager can also be a blast-- you get to spend all day at school with friends, avoid most responsibility to pay bills or put food on the table, and get the chance to shape your life and future unlike any prior time in your life. So, especially when times are tough, take some time to enjoy the present moment. Take a deep breath and ground yourself in the here and now. You're young, and the whole world is in front of you. Even more importantly, you have the ability, right now, to make it perfect.
    • Remember, being a teenager doesn't mean you can't be a kid still. Have some fun, break a rule or two, and kick back and relax. Enjoy life!
    • As important as your teenage years are, they aren't everything. Everyone makes mistakes, loses sight of goals, and takes a few wrong turns in their teenage years. There is very little you can do now to "ruin the rest of your life," no matter how bad things seem.[5]
  6. No one can completely escape bad thoughts or events, and that is okay. Instead of wallowing in them, find ways to think of them as positives. For example, you may fail a test in chemistry, an event that doesn't seem to have any upside. However, this failure tells you something useful about your study habits, the skills you still need to work on, and potentially something about your enjoyment and engagement in chemistry. You can use this failure to make you a better student and person.
    • Avoid damaging or hurtful language in your own head. Don't say "everyone hates me" when you know that this isn't true of your friends and family. Don't say "mom will kill me if I fail," when you know deep down that she'll love you nonetheless.[6]
  7. No life is ever perfect. There will always be mistakes, setbacks, misunderstandings, and plain bad luck. But these issues are all chances to improve yourself, and how you react to the bad times is far more important than the bad times themselves. Acknowledge that your life will never be perfect, but that you can get a little bit closer each time you overcome trouble or hardship.
    • When something bad happens, keep your cool and think "how can I handle this?" Avoid blaming yourself or others, lashing out, or wallowing in self-pity. Pick yourself up, find a solution, and think of ways to prevent a similar issue from occurring later in life.[7]
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Method 2
Method 2 of 3:

Adopting a Happy, Healthy Lifestyle

  1. Popularity is not some elusive, impossible goal that only the "cool kids" can attain. Being popular is just about having friends and acquaintances, and all this really requires is a kind heart and open mind. Say hello to your classmates, and ask people how they're doing if they feel down. Never reject a potential friendship based on someone's outward appearances or hobbies, as you'll find that most people are friendly if you give them the chance.
    • That said, you should accept that not everyone will be your friend. This isn't your fault, it is their decision. Simply move on, continuing to be polite and friendly, and know that there are many, many more people in the world.
  2. You don't need to be super skinny in order to be healthy. Regular exercise is proven to enhance your concentration, well-being, and happiness, and you don't have to do grueling solitary runs to get the benefit. Go for a swim, ride your bike, play a sport, or take a few hikes. You can even adapt many of your hobbies into "exercises," such as taking photography walks or listening to a new album every time you hit the gym.
    • In general, you should aim for 30 minutes of exercise a day.
    • Grabbing an exercise buddy makes exercise more enjoyable, and it is easier to stick to your schedule.[8]
  3. A healthy diet promotes a healthy head of hair, nails, skin, muscles, and mind. Teenagers have fast metabolisms that allow them to eat almost anything without major weight shifts, but a healthy diet will give you greater energy, focus, and general well-being no matter what age you are. Of course, the occasional treat is acceptable, but you'll be surprised how much better you feel on a better diet overall. A healthy diet includes:
    • Regular meals, including breakfast, lunch, and dinner, every single day.
    • At least 3-4 fruits and vegetables a day. The vitamins and minerals in fresh produce are essential for a developing brain and body.
    • Lean proteins like chicken, fish, eggs, and beans.
    • Eating slowly. Wait 10 minutes before getting seconds, as it takes your body time to realize that it is full. This will eliminate over-eating.
    • Cutting back on fast food, sugary sodas and candies, and fatty foods like pizza and fried options.
  4. Do things on time, and never ever leave your room messy. If you're happy and organizes at home, the happiness will be reflected everywhere else in your life. Moreover, research has shown that an organized and clean physical environment can help you defeat stress and feel more in control mentally as well.[9]
    • Take 10-15 minutes once a week to relax, put on some music, and tidy up. If you just do a little a week it will keep you ahead of the dreaded "deep clean."
  5. Read books, check out the news, and make an effort to see the movies, plays, and events that appeal to you. One of the best parts of being a teenager is the feeling of constant growth that comes with being young. The best way to keep this feeling alive is to expose yourself to as much new material as possible. Teachers and school are great for this, but you should also follow your own passions. Where does your mind lead you? This is often the stuff that will make you happiest. It can also open the doors for your future, and show you potential careers or goals for life.[10]
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Method 3
Method 3 of 3:

Planning for your Future

  1. What would you love to do for a living? Where would you like to live? What hobbies would you like to pursue? You don't need definitive answers for any of these questions, but this is a good way to get the ball rolling and help you find ways to prepare and train for adulthood. Brainstorm what you want life to look like when you're 20, 30, and 50. Note what things are important to you, and know that there are absolutely no wrong answers. You may want to be living easy in a beautiful location, or working hard in the bustling big city, it doesn't matter. Having an idea of your goals and dreams for the future helps you make the most of the present.
    • If you're having trouble, think about all of the things you don't want to do. This can reveal your real passions.[14]
  2. Perfection only comes one small step at a time. You will not become the most popular kid at school, the best soccer player, or an award-winning filmmaker overnight, but you can start taking steps now to make these goals a reality. Start with your end goal, then work backward. What do you have to accomplish to get there? For example, if you wanted to be a professional soccer player:
    • Sign with a professional team or club.
    • Play high-level college soccer.
    • Get recruited to a college soccer team.
    • Succeed on a competitive youth team.
    • Train for your tryouts.
    • Improve you shooting, passing, opposite foot, and fitness.
    • Talk with current coaches and players about skills you still need to learn to become a pro in 10 years.
  3. Being a teenager is hard. You have a lot of people -- coaches, parents, teachers -- who all have different plans and ideas for your future. There is so much advice being shoved at you that it is hard to listen to the one person who knows you best: you. As much as possible, schedule time in your life to pursue your own passions, whether that includes finishing all of the Game of Thrones books or coding your own app.
    • Let people know your goals and ask them for their support. Oftentimes, adults don't realize what you want to do and compensate by telling you what they think you should be doing. Take pride in your plans and let people now so that they can help you.
  4. This is a great way to get an idea about what you need to do in order to make your dreams come true. It also helps you find out the realities of the job you hope to have, which may or may not influence how you feel about it. If you don't know anyone in your chosen field, fire off some emails to magazines or companies that do what you love and ask if they would be willing to answer any questions. Colleges and universities are other great places to get in touch with people with experience in your field. Some questions to ask include:
    • What is a typical day in your job like?
    • What do you like about work? What would you change?
    • If you could give yourself any advice when you were my age, what would it be?
  5. One of the biggest burdens on a teenager's mind is the worry that they have to plan their entire lives now or they will fail in the future. Nothing can be further from the truth. History is filled with stories of people who ended up in wildly different places than where they started, and you shouldn't stress yourself out planning a perfect future when chances are good your desires will change. Just work on being happy, expanding your mind, and sticking to your passions. The success will come, and the doors will open.[12]
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  • No one has a perfect life, so don't fret if you still have things to fix. Focus on enjoying the good instead of bemoaning the bad.
  • This is not just a one day process. Having a life you're proud of takes time, patience, and courage.

About This Article

Ira Israel
Co-authored by:
Licensed Counselor and Psychotherapist
This article was co-authored by Ira Israel. Ira Israel is a Licensed Counselor and Psychotherapist who has been in private practice for over 14 years. He specializes in teaching others about happiness and authenticity. Ira teaches sold-out Happiness and Authenticity workshops at Esalen Institute and Kripalu Center and has written over 400 articles on psychology, philosophy, Buddhism, yoga, film, art, music & literature for The Huffington Post, Good Men Project, Mind Body Green, Thrive Global, and Medium. Ira is also the author of How to Survive Your Childhood Now That You’re an Adult: A Path to Authenticity and Awakening. He attended The University of Pennsylvania and has graduate degrees in Psychology, Philosophy, and Religious Studies. This article has been viewed 178,409 times.
12 votes - 60%
Co-authors: 36
Updated: March 8, 2024
Views: 178,409
Categories: Youth
Article SummaryX

While having a perfect life as a teenager might not be possible, finding what’s perfect about every day can help you lead a more fulfilling life. Focus on the things that are in your control, like your studies and lifestyle. If school feels like a chore, reframe your attitude and see it as a chance to grow. Another way to improve your well-being is to help others through things like volunteering and tutoring. However, make sure to schedule in some “me time” too, even if it’s just 15 minutes a day to listen to music, go for a walk, or daydream. Since no one can escape bad days, it’s good to have a plan to tackle them. For example, if you fail a test, use it as motivation to improve your study skills. To learn how to use a healthy lifestyle to have a more perfect life, keep reading!

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